I am not a running genius. I rely heavily on the guidance of my crazy soon to be ultra runner boyfriend on workouts, diet, and mentally preparing myself for a big race. I cannot offer expert advice or tell anyone I know exactly what I am doing because half the time I am just guessing.
You maybe wondering why run a marathon if you have no idea what you are doing?
This simple answer is this. I do not want to come to the end of my life and think of the could have beens, the it’s too late for that nows, and the if only I would haves. Life is too short and too precious for such things. I want my life to be what it was created to be, epic.
For too long I waited for the right moments, gave up on things too soon, and wished I wouldn’t have been afraid of something. That’s part of the reason I am writing this blog. I am sick and tired of wasting the best years of my life waiting for money, or a house, or things. I want authentic experience.
I want the next 25 years of my life to resemble the person I am on the inside and not the shell I wear on the outside.
I am not just another cog in the wheel, I am not a weak girl who needs saving, I have overcome obstacles that some couldn’t imagine and all of these, sometimes traumatic, experiences shaped me into the person I am today. I still mess up, I still struggle, but I’m sick and tired of being held back.
Running has given me an outlet where I can say I just did that run. It is something that is completely for myself, no one can take credit for my successes in the sport but me. Being someone who has struggled with the idea that I am not good enough, this aspect of running saved my life.
Are there better runners than me, yeah and there always will be. But their success does not mean my failure.
Even if I finish dead last in Seattle on November 25, I can still say I did it. No one will ever take that away from me.